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Lessons from a life coach: What self-respect really means. 

female life coach in polka dot short is at a desk with a laptop in front and smiling at the camera

As a life and self-love coach who supports women to transform their lives, self-respect is one of the essential principles that I've found necessary for building a happy, successful, confident and fulfilled life. 

True, meaningful, self-respect goes deeper than treating yourself the way that you'd want others to treat you.

Genuine self-respect comes from prioritising the things about you that truly matter; the things that it can be all too easy to push down the list when faced with the chaos of daily life.

Things like your dreams, passions, talents, desires and time.

Working with women to build their self-worth, I’ve found respecting your dreams, passions, talents and time means actually believing that you are enough of a priority for these things to matter - to you and to other people.

Building self-respect can be about learning how you can stop doing a job you don’t enjoy just so you can make a living, and how to start going after the job you'd always dreamed of, so you can live a life you love instead.

It can be about valuing and honouring yourself and your time; by protecting it, saying no, or finding a way to carve out time for yourself.

It can be about finding ways to let go of mistakes more easily.

It can be about expressing the unique qualities and quirks that you're proud of and make you feel in your own personal power.

It can be about recognising that you are important enough for your personal growth to matter, and recognising its importance for building a full and happy life.  

Self-respect gives you the confidence to prioritise that growth by investing in and believing in yourself.

What happens when you lack self-respect

When you don't respect yourself enough it (understandably) has a negative impact on your self-esteem.

This is because you’re essentially saying you’re not good enough, important enough, or deserving enough of showing yourself respect, or respecting your wants and needs.

This lack of self-esteem can cause you to start acting out behaviours that make you feel like 💩. 

These behaviours and thought processes – like negative self-talk, feeling overwhelmed with no time for yourself, eating unhealthily, procrastinating, or putting your desires, hopes and dreams at the bottom of the pile – can all be traced back to a lack of self-respect.

When you give more respect to yourself and your dreams, talents, desires, you'll start feeling more and more secure in yourself and your life.

You'll be happier, start trusting your gut and find it easier to acknowledge your strengths and weaknesses, instead of avoiding or making excuses for them.

Doing all this will change your vibe (vibration) and help you attract the good things, love, people, wealth etc you want – and deserve – in life.

Give yourself permission to pursue what gives you joy and cut out what drains your happiness.

Some starter tips for showing yourself respect are:

1️⃣ Make a list of the things that make you feel alive, fulfilled, peaceful, happy and magnetic.

2️⃣ Make a plan and commit to doing them more often. Put it in your diary as a recurring reminder.

Tell someone you'll do it so they can hold you accountable.

Believe that you deserve to have the best life you can imagine - because you do 💝

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