If there’s one popular phrase that’s often a complete understatement, it’s that life isn’t always easy.
It can be hard. In fact, sometimes, it can be downright impossible.
Resilience is defined as “the ability to withstand adversity and bounce back from difficult life events."
Developing a resilient mindset is key to adapting to difficult challenges, and not allowing those bad days to take pull you under.
It can make you mentally and emotionally stronger, and means you that you can look for opportunities among the mess.
How you respond to the things that challenge you can determine your level of success in life and love.
It also affects your view of yourself, which has a MASSIVE impact on what you're able to achieve.
Here are some tips from me that I hope will support you to develop that resilient mindset:
1. Change your perspective
The ability to practice resilience is often about perspective. As Dr Wayne Dyer said, “when you change how you look at things, the things you look at change".
Next time something sh*tty happens to challenge you, instead of thinking from a victim mentality of “why is this happening to me?", instead try thinking from a place of empowerment by asking, “what is this preparing me for? What is this teaching me, about me or my situation?”.
If you're able to change your perspective on what has happened to you and why, it can be SO powerful.
2. Focus on what you CAN do
The past is the past, and what’s happened has happened. How much energy are you focusing on something upsetting that’s happened in the past?
How much do you dwell on it, get angry about it, get upset about it?
There is nothing you can do about what’s past, and the more (negative) energy and attention you focus on it, the harder it will be to overcome.
Instead of focusing on what you can't change about the situation, focus on what you CAN do. What positive action can you take?
Again, it's about moving quickly from pain to power.
3. Watch the meaning you are attaching to the event
When something bad or sad happens to you, take note of the meaning you are attaching to it.
Are you saying that it must mean you are an unlucky person, unlovable, undeserving of good things etc.?
Take yourself out of the picture for a moment and imagine this was happening to a friend. If they told you what they thought this happenstance meant about them, what would you think/say?
I very much doubt you would agree with their opinion. You’d probably think they had exaggerated the meaning – and it’s likely you have too.
If you notice yourself doing this, then ask what’s another meaning you could attach to it instead?
4. Remember, it’s (generally) always happening in your favour
Think of something in your past that at the time it happened, was a real upset or disappointment, but worked out okay in the end.
Perhaps a bad breakup, losing out on a job, failing an exam.
Write this thing down, and then list three positive things that would not have come about, had this upset or disappointment not occurred in the first place.
Then try to remember that when the chips are down and the universe looks like it’s pooping on your parade, it’s actually giving you a gift.
I hope you enjoyed these tips for developing a resilient mindset.
If you need support in developing a resilient mindset, get in touch or book a free call with me for more details on how my coaching could help.